The Not Fast & The Feeble

Have you ever noticed how sequels to movies are often worse than the originals? I'm not sure why that is, but it appears that it also applies to hoons in car parks. 


Yes, they were at it again tonight. 


Now, before anyone assumes that I don't understand the need, the need for speed (Ok Mav, let's turn and burn!), let me assure you I love it. I have left rubber in anger at the same race tracks where world championship Group A touring car events and V8 supercar events were held. Additionally, being a lover of power to weight ratio, I only needed two wheels. Yes, I love my sports bikes. I love cars too, but being somewhat stingy with money you can go way faster and scare yourself way more for far less money on a bike than in a car. Hrm, new shoes and a night out at a totally fancy restaurant and a tank of petrol for my bike vs a tank of petrol for some hooning in a performance car?? uhmm, I know which I'd rather most of the time. Not that I wouldn't mind a fast car, but my bike cost (locally) $12,000 when new (although I bought it for half that) and it does the 1/4 mile faster than Ferrari 360 Modena that costs 30x more (and with the depreciation, the car would have lost the value of a one bedroom apartment in a trendy suburb in the process).. I even think my bike looks better.. ha!


But before this blog entry turns into a motorcycle love-in (which I could so easily do), lets return to those hoons doing what I can only imagine is practice at an area under a bridge adjacent to a parking lot. If I had a big placard, I would write a big bold 4.5 on it and hold it out the window; nice try guys, but ultimately a fail. If they were trying to drift u-turns, choppy tyre noises and an inconsistent engine tone indicated they lacked the commitment or the skills to execute the manoeuvres correctly. If they were trying to do circle work, well, I've done better burnouts in my old underpowered 2-litre Celica. If you need a run up to do circle work you really need to go home. 


I love watching motor sport on the idiot box, I love the smell of 2-stroke, I love feeling a car drift under you just as you apex a corner with precision and I love leaning a bike over so far that sparks fly from the footpegs and you're getting a wombat-eye view of the road. What I don't appreciate is being kept up by wannabe's thinking that public roads are their raceway and telegraphing their own incompetence in the process. Guys, just 'cause it's night time and it's dark, it doesn't mean that people can't see that you are pathetic.